Tuesday, August 25, 2015

And this is a Tuesday evening

This has been an interesting evening with the two juniors. First, the elder asked me if he was gay.

Me: Do you like girls?
D: Yeah.
Me: Do you want to kiss girls?
D: YEAH! (Too much enthusiasm there, GNP, take it down a notch for America.)
Me: Do you want to kiss guys?
D: No.
Me: You're not gay.

Then I had to define some terms that he wanted to confirm the definitions of. The words were the F word, and Douche (bag). So I gave him a brief grammatical dissertation on the word "Fuck" and that it can be used as many parts of speech (his eyes started to glaze over when I was describing how it can be used as a transitive verb AND an intransitive verb). I also told him the meaning of it. Didn't go into as much detail with the Massengil object; I told him that it was used to clean and now it's used to describe someone who is a slimy jerk. He seemed satisfied. I managed to not shake my head off.

After that, the younger was getting ready for his bath and decided to "shuck my clothes off in the hall!" D asked him, "Shucked?" A explained: "Yeah. Shucking my cloths. You shuck corn because you have to take all the stuff off, so I shucked my clothes off."

Um, you're six. You are not supposed to be able to form conclusions like that. And stop getting nekkid in the hallway, weirdo.

This is turning into one of those nights that I wish I drank as much as I say I do.

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